The Global Sperm Count Decline

Perhaps you’ve heard statistics like, “for the past 100 years, the average sperm count has been going down about 1% each year.”

It’s true. The book Count Down by Shanna Swan will break it all down for you.

What is NOT causing the global sperm count decline:

  • Alcohol
  • Stress
  • Caffeine
  • Cigarettes
  • Fast Living

While these things DO lower your sperm count, they are not responsible for the global problem.

What IS causing the global sperm count decline:

  • Phthalates

What are phthalates? A google search says: “phthalates are chemicals commonly found in plastic products and many products that smell good.” That’s too general a definition. Things to worry about include: plastics, vinyl, pesticides, anything in a plastic bottle (and it’s even worse if that bottle has been warm or out in the sun), anything wrapped in plastic, any food wrapped in plastic, air fresheners, personal care products, etc, ad infinitum. We’re fucked.

There is a whole lot more than what I listed. You’re going to need a copy of the book Count Down, and take a look at the website ewg.org. But this article isn’t really set to be a primer on what to do and what not to do. You can find that out on your own. This article is about a personal anecdote that seems to prove this environmental problem of “phthalates-everywhere.”

There’s an old Jesusian saying from the Bible: “it rains on the just and the unjust.”

I’m Gen-X, and I have a fictive kinship with a guy about my age who is quite devotionally an “intellectual” type of Christian and has been his whole life. Let’s just say his lifestyle would appear to be sort of the opposite of mine. However, we have a couple of things in common: we are both unmarried and non-fathers.

Did you know that some men in this day and age can get tricked into becoming Christian for the promise of a wife and children? I’ve been off-and-on with Christianity throughout my life and this was one of the lures that helped to trick me back into it for a hot minute. Alas, there are many Christian Gen-X men in this day and age that are dateless. Lol, I’ll be honest: “If there’s no wife and kids, then what possible point is there in being Christian?” Like, why, pray-tell, would you be Christian if there’s nothing about it that gets you a wife and kids? You really, really have to ask “what is this religion doing for me?” Oh yes, be warned when you force an unmarried, non-father Gen-X Christian to answer what Christianity is doing for them they will give you some really fucked up answer like, “Well, I’m not selfish. Being Christian doesn’t mean I necessarily get anything from Christianity. I’m on God’s path that he has laid out for me.” Something really retarded like that. Cope, cope, cope, and more cope. Their drug of choice is copium, so prepare for your eyes to roll, roll, roll back into you head.

Jesus will not save ANY Christian from phthalates. If you want to lower the phthalates in your body in order to try and restore your sperm count, it’s you that will have to do it. That is not to say that there isn’t a type of Christian out there that likely has way less phthalates in their bodies than everyone else: The Amish. For some reason, I haven’t been tricked into trying to become Amish yet.

Globally, the the population is about to sharply decline. People are not pro-creating and the reigning theory right now is that it’s 1000% related to lowered sperm counts. You thought maybe you weren’t an environmentalist, but when the environmental problems come for the unmarried and non-father man’s sperm – now we have a new breed of environmentalists. Nothing is fucked, you say? “The goddamn plane has crashed into the mountain!”